Category Archives: Sports

Deep Throat

Two points from match point at the U.S. Open semifinals on Saturday night, the defending champion Serena Williams decided to verbally assault a defenseless line judge half her size with a racket in her face, yelling naughty words, shaking the ball in the officials direction while threatening bodily harm…. annnnd  as if that wasn’t enough she topped it all off  with an oath to her God that it would happen!

I swear to God, I'm fukin' takin' this ball and shovin' it in your fukin' throat… I swear to God."

I swear to God, I'm fukin' takin' this ball and shovin' it in your fukin' throat..I swear to God."

Serena was penalized a point for unsportsmanlike conduct and lost the match…… Gulp!

ball down your throat


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NFL 2009 bold predicitons

The Oakland raiders will be the surprise team of the year.

Michael Vick makes up a brand new offensive scheme called the Wild Dog


Tony Romo starts to secretly date Lucy Liu. snaps the first official  pictures

tony romo

Terrell Owens will get shot but not seriously injured. Kind of like the first time Tupac got shot but still came out of the hospital the same day kind of injured.


An Australian  finally win a super bowl ring.

afl nfl

The Detroit Lions will win a game this year.

Mark Sanchez will be ROY and his Jets will challenge New England for the division championship.

Neither the Steelers nor the Patriots will reach the super bowl.
The Vikings will win the super bowl, then Brett Farv raah will retire then un-retire before retiring and un-retiring from the NFL just after training camp finishes


Chad Ocho Cinco gets suspended for an over extravagant and highly inappropriate touchdown dance. Ron Artest of the Los Angeles Lakers twitters “that’s wack, ocho I got yo back!” Ocho Cinco see’s this and since he has some free time on his hands he flys down to L.A and catch a Lakers game and sits courtside next to Jack Nicholson.

ochocinco jack nicholson

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NFL Power Rankings

power rankings week 1

Finally the wait is over… power rankings are back

I think the second comment below the rankings by bradyisbetterthanmanning sums up how were all feeling!

nfl power rankings

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Behold my dragon finger wu-tang killabee technique!

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So the season begins…

….well the season within the season! The AFL finals race is here, at long last – sometimes I wonder why the season is so long, I mean what happened in round 4, or 7 or 15 for that matter that now has a real effect on eight teams quest for immortality… another topic for another time!  Six Victorian team, two interstate, balance has been restored and one would say it’s a fair chance the premiership cup won’t be travelling far from the ‘G post 5pm September 26!

Before that one day in September though we have three weeks of finals to get through, lets have a look at the matches, what you will see and what you won’t!

Adel v Ess – AAMI, Friday night

Adel v Ess

If last weeks effort by Adelaide is anything to take notice off… Essendon don’t bother getting on the flight! An awesome display by a team that many believe has the slightest of sniffs this September. Suspensions and the impact of such a physical game last weekend will see Essendon’s season over come Friday night, a season to be considered a success all the same.  Adelaide by 30 plus.

What you will see –

A dominate Adelaide forward line potentially wreck havoc! Something for all teams to worry about over the next few years; Otten, Porplyzia, Burton, Knights, Tippet, Hentschel and Dangerfield drifting in, good signs for the future!

What you won’t see –

Essendon’s characteristic run and carry. Jobe Watson needs a rest, Ryder is out, Prismall is out, Monfries and Stanton played their big game last week. well done Dons, hope not to see you back next year!

Geel v WB – ‘G, Saturday Arvo

Geel v WB

Absolute cracker ensuing! This will be a final to remember.  At this point of the season there is not much that separates these two teams.  Looking at the last eight weeks subjectively the Doggies should be all over this, however Geelong has been the dominate power of the AFL for two and a half seasons and may just be about to turn it back on.  evenly matched Brian Lake very well could be the difference here, Geelong’s much rated backline cant do much about midfielders that continually drift forward and kick goals, it will be up to the awesome talent located in Geelongs engine room to come to party and put a stop to this, because the form Lake is in he will bath up Tommy Hawkins, and the big Moon in the process!  Dogs by 10 points.

What you will see –

Ablett stamp himself as one of the truly great midfielders playing the game, but also the emergence of Shaun Higgins doing the job for the other side.  Keep an eye out for more Aker brilliance, 85,000 plus just means he will turn it on

What you won’t see –

A blow out, Geelong might start well, but just watch the Dogs fight back!

Bris v Carl – Gabbatoir, Satday Night

blue lion

Some sneaking work from Michael Voss has Carlton wondering what to expect come Saturday night, Simon Black looked gone against the Swans, if so why didn’t he come off? Hhhmmm! The blues had won three in a row, against some good teams coming into last weekend’s blowout against the Crows, not good prep before the finals.  Brisbane has been solid all year without being spectacular.  Carlton with two wins in Queensland this year should give them plenty of confidence. Blues by 20 plus points.

What you will see –

Simon Black playing and Brendan Fevola lighting up the Gabba.  Eights goals last time to Fev and you can expect the same this time round, no backman for the Lions leaves the door open for 10!

What you won’t see –

A display from Carlton’s midfield like last week.  stinging criticism from Terry ‘sunbed’ Wallace will have Murphy, Gibbs, Scotland and Judd running both ways like they were back doing the beep test!

StK v Coll – ‘G, Sunday


Game of the round.  Collingwood in cracking form, till last week, and the Saints putting together a remarkable 20-2 season, although slightly losing their way towards the end.  I’m slightly worried for the St Kilda faithful that they may have peaked to soon, but with the quality of players they have, that sort of touch doesn’t just disappear, unless the focus does! Collingwood believe they are a huge chance to go all the way, the army will storm Melbourne from all over the country should they pull it off… might be time to mobilise the troops. Pies by 3 goals

What you will see –

Nick Riewoldt play like a man possessed. Time for the big blonde leader to stamp his authority on the game, will be the best centre half forward in the game come the end of the finals.  Keep an eye on Dale Thomas also, overdue for a hanger and with 90,000 plus in the stands may send everyone away with something to talk about

What you won’t see –

Luke Ball and Max Hudghton running around.  This will be the decision R Lyon will be amending next week when the saints look to avoid going out in straight sets!

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It’s all about the ¥.E.N

Korea's little master

Korea's little master

Y.E. Yang’s victory of Tiger Woods in the US PGA was unthinkable, unfathomable and unbelievable. I mean come on, Tiger was wearing his power red, he was in front after the 3rd round, he’s never been beaten from this position at a major in 15 attempts.

What the?

Tiger is only half asian, what chance did he have?

But the little man from Korea was able to take it out.

It shows the shifting centre of the sports world further to the East. And why is this good news for Golf? The East has a number of important things to offer sport, but the most attractive? M.O.N.E.Y

In a time when world economies are facing negative growth, emerging Asian markets are a beacon of light for sports. They offer a previously untapped consumer base with an increasing discretionary income and Athletes that are rising to be the best in the world.

In by-gone eras, the aristocracy of golf with their country club rules and xenophobic views would’ve found the emergence of Asian players intolerable, but their growing acceptance has paved the way for the development of golf courses throughout Asia and increased prominence of the Asian tour.

Tiger struggled in the early part of his career for acceptance (infamously Fuzzy Zoeller made racist remarks during the 1997 US Masters) and it seemed that his ability and skill couldn’t swing the conservatives.

But now the victory of Yang is being described as the dawn of a new era, a brave new world. It seems in sport, as in life, its all about the ¥.E.N (and the Yuan, and the Won and the Rupee and the Baht…)

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Take two

Michael Vick’s heading to Philly, well, well, well – from this sports fan, that’s great news! Sure enough he has done some bad things, if by bad you think, not paying a parking ticket, stealing from the locker room, even DUI… then I’m afraid you are so far off the mark its not worth mentioning, however he is back, he’s done his time, he’s remorseful for what he’s done, and more importantly he’s getting a second chance!

Vick in happier days

Yes, the great second chance, does everyone deserve one, probably not, do sports stars that bring fans to the games, inspire kids to get up and do something, and achieve that goal all commissioners desire, turn the sport they play into entertainment, then yes, they deserve a second chance!  If Michael Vick is getting the biggest second chance then who else playing elite sport has also been given a second chance? Lets have a look, from a down under perspective.

A name that springs immediately to mind is Ben Cousins of the AFL. MVP, Premiership medal, club captain, cast out of the game he loves for 12 months due to drug addiction he hung on for dear life as his name was the last read out on pre-season draft day.  In true champion style he has been the shinning light of a dismal team enduring a dismal year!


Ricky Pointing isn’t a name you immediately think of when considering second chances, but the fiery Tasmania with the second most important job in Australia was at a cross roads when he decided to let his fists do the talking at the Bourban and Beef House a number of years back, calls for his baggy green to be handed in at the time look a little misconceived now!


A nasty bouncer…

Sticking with the willow, how many second chances can one star performer get? Just ask Shane Warne, the man capable of turning a ball on, let alone making it spin was afforded several second chances during his career that was sprinkled with text message controversy and marriage breakdown – did Australia’s ‘sporting’ public care? No, they didn’t!


At the end of the day, socially and morally everyone is responsible for their own actions. This is essentially what society is built upon, the second chance is what makes sport, and sports stars enjoyable to watch!

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